Ok where do I start? How about the beginning?! :)
It's only been very recent that I've chosen to see a counselor on a regular basis and am devoted to making sleep a priority in my life now that I'm fully aware and mindful of its positive effects on me. :)
The lack of sleep has affected every aspect of my life from a very young age as far back as I can remember...five or six. It's the year my parent's problems at home had reached its peak.
Separation and divorced ensued with my dad leaving in 1980. For the next ten years there were three of us in the house.
My mum's relentless pursuit of education and trying to find full-time work as teacher in Montreal, meant I was home alone a lot. My sister, eight years my elder was finishing high school and left for McGill in 1988. Home life was filled with daily and relentless arguing between mother and daughter. Crying myself to sleep became a regular routine for years, not the positive aurora around sleeping at all. It's probably the underlying reason why getting to bed, just getting to the frickin bedroom has always been an issue even at 46! Yet when my head hits the pillow, I'm out like light! My weekend visits with my father were mostly positive yet his sleeping routine was terrible and staying up late well past 2am was a regular occurrence for us. He was a pilot with Air Canada flying overseas, dealing with jet lag, and i'm sure not intentional yet perhaps not completely aware and mindful of the effects this would have on his son.
Throughout elementary, high school and college, I scraped through....always yawning, always tired, brain fog for years! It seems like such a simple thing to recognize yet I relate it an bad addiction. These negative learned behaviors can be unlearned as well and thats why I'm here. I've never had a regular routine.
Been self employed for fifteen years with a renovation contracting business, no partners. I'm definitely not where I would like to be with this business. It's been a struggle, yet I wonder where I'd be if I was actually awake most of the time. I've done some amazing work over the years, yet the brain fog has held me back considerably. I've made a lot of poor decisions, yet did I grow? I feel like I've been making the same mistakes over and over...all related to lack of sleep! It affects every facet of my life. My emotional stability, my financials, physically, my relationships with people, daily decisions.
Upon starting the Sleep Mastery course, I was excited and motivated. The first few days were great. Yet realize I have a learned pattern when taking on something new, after 4-5 days, I return to my old ways.
The fact that I recognize and am aware of this now is incredibly powerful for my continued transformation. The case is the point, as I write this, my class is on Day 10, I'm still on Day 2.
Just writing this blurb is helpful and powerful. Time to revise and move forward. I look forward to writing this again upon completion. :) Tally ho!
It's only been very recent that I've chosen to see a counselor on a regular basis and am devoted to making sleep a priority in my life now that I'm fully aware and mindful of its positive effects on me. :)
The lack of sleep has affected every aspect of my life from a very young age as far back as I can remember...five or six. It's the year my parent's problems at home had reached its peak.
Separation and divorced ensued with my dad leaving in 1980. For the next ten years there were three of us in the house.
My mum's relentless pursuit of education and trying to find full-time work as teacher in Montreal, meant I was home alone a lot. My sister, eight years my elder was finishing high school and left for McGill in 1988. Home life was filled with daily and relentless arguing between mother and daughter. Crying myself to sleep became a regular routine for years, not the positive aurora around sleeping at all. It's probably the underlying reason why getting to bed, just getting to the frickin bedroom has always been an issue even at 46! Yet when my head hits the pillow, I'm out like light! My weekend visits with my father were mostly positive yet his sleeping routine was terrible and staying up late well past 2am was a regular occurrence for us. He was a pilot with Air Canada flying overseas, dealing with jet lag, and i'm sure not intentional yet perhaps not completely aware and mindful of the effects this would have on his son.
Throughout elementary, high school and college, I scraped through....always yawning, always tired, brain fog for years! It seems like such a simple thing to recognize yet I relate it an bad addiction. These negative learned behaviors can be unlearned as well and thats why I'm here. I've never had a regular routine.
Been self employed for fifteen years with a renovation contracting business, no partners. I'm definitely not where I would like to be with this business. It's been a struggle, yet I wonder where I'd be if I was actually awake most of the time. I've done some amazing work over the years, yet the brain fog has held me back considerably. I've made a lot of poor decisions, yet did I grow? I feel like I've been making the same mistakes over and over...all related to lack of sleep! It affects every facet of my life. My emotional stability, my financials, physically, my relationships with people, daily decisions.
Upon starting the Sleep Mastery course, I was excited and motivated. The first few days were great. Yet realize I have a learned pattern when taking on something new, after 4-5 days, I return to my old ways.
The fact that I recognize and am aware of this now is incredibly powerful for my continued transformation. The case is the point, as I write this, my class is on Day 10, I'm still on Day 2.
Just writing this blurb is helpful and powerful. Time to revise and move forward. I look forward to writing this again upon completion. :) Tally ho!