“My Thoughts Become Me” Dreams are defined as a state of unawareness of one’s surroundings. If true, I was living the dream. I was unconscious around food. There is little doubt by listening to the insidious voices of the food industry over decades I was programmed to robotically eat food. It is true, many nights I woke up eating a PB&J sandwich while my other hand held a second. I’d wonder as I gazed over at the second sandwich, “How the hell did that get there?” I was in deep food coma. Sick and obese I could no longer stomach the nightmare I had become. In the shadows of a food industry caring more about wealth than human health, an outgrowth of businesses was birthed to support the fall out of human casualties from this dilemma. The bright and shining diet industry seduced me, assuring me they had my best interest in mind. I believed. I signed up. I read the books. I lost pounds. I felt better. Then within 30 days there was gaining. My habitual thoughts gained control, once again. My mind chatter led me to more pounds, more diet sign ups and more unhappiness.
Over 60 years I battled emotional overeating and food disorders. (At least now I can identify my problems. In the early years I identified my problems by thinking I was fat, ugly and stupid, as there were no words to describe my food issues.) My days were filled with thoughts of food and failure. I was so lost I didn’t know who I was. I was always asking my friends, “Am I about that size?” Reality struck one day as I noticed the size of my shadow on the sidewalk. I mentally checked off the possibility of becoming the 49ers new right guard. Things got dark. There was no Knight in shining armor to shed a little light on my kingdom. I continued to eat my way through life. January 2020- My computer screen was filled with this charming guy recommending a program that redesigned his body and mind. I immediately thought, “Here we go again.” Another guy came on for the pitch talking about “Wild Things”. I signed up at… “It’s not your fault your fat”. February 2020- I was assigned a partner through our tribe’s Facebook group.
Erica from Canada has become my new best friend, as daily talks fortify our wild journey. Together we were introduced to the genius of the Wildfit program and the wisdom of its leader, Eric Edmeades. The first two weeks we joyfully ate a smorgasbord of anything we desired. “Without guilt I ate four donuts this morning,” I told Erica. Immediately I covered with, “I was supposed to, if I wanted them, Eric said so,” while feeling years of food guilt in my words. Erica reminded me, Eric also said, “Eat and drink green stuff daily.” I did that, too. Our friendly partnership was working and now cherished as we live “Wildfit”. I was introduced to my Angel and Devil voices, parts of me long forgotten. I journaled to reacquaint myself and the roles they played, even the ones beyond food. This work was profound for me and brought me to conscious eating, giving up years of eating in trance. Each week I consciously let go of one food and then another. These were trusted foods I had depended on for years to help me stuff emotions and feel better. Each week was an adjustment, marked with learning curves turning into wisdom. I was giving up food that was not natural to my body. Eric’s talk about the digestion system was like five-alarm sirens waking me up. He made it clear my digestive system has difficulty breaking down foods foreign to my body, such as the lifetime of processed foods I had been eating. This assimilation process is rigorous and draws energy away from other systems in my body. This stopped me in my tracks. I realized the years of exhaustion I had felt was caused by eating mountains of processed foods. Eating to feel better, I was actually draining my body of life energy. This knowledge changed my way of eating and my life forever. Noticing my face was thinner a friend asked, “What’s different this time?” “I no longer eat unconsciously, unless I do,” I said quickly to the set of deer in the head light eyes sitting across from me. March 2020- I was becoming aware that years of brainwashed thoughts wasn’t going to change overnight.
The most relevant information I discovered about myself was I had been an unconscious eater all my life. Now I am gentle with myself when I witness a “food faux pas” here and there. I know this behavior has been triggered by deep neuro grooves in my brain created by years of habitual patterns and programming. Now, I override these patterns by acknowledging them and replacing them with new thoughts, feelings and actions. Consciously I start deep breathing, or taking a walk, drinking water or just plain talking to myself telling my brain, “‘tis the season for change.” Change brings variety to my table from artichokes, kohlrabi, asparagus and greens too numerous to remember their names. As I dine on bits of wild venison, bison and salmon I sense a transgenerational change deep in my cells, the awakening of my hunter/gatherer lineage. Pulling “all-nighters” most of my life, making up for procrastination and self-doubt by day, I would use the mid-night oil to get a job done. Now, I lay me down to sleep when the stars peek out at twilight. I feel calm when I awake at 1 am, remembering this is quite a natural human response. Eric’s tales of the African Hadza tribe that awakes and gathers at the fire in the wee hours of the night reassured me of this natural instinct I hold. I light a candle and go about my night’s work with a sense of clarity. This clarity brings out my muse ready to author a new piece of work. In the past, her absence sent me on a night hunt among the refrigerator shelves. Another benefit of clarity, when hunger strikes, I rely on the juice of life, cool clear water. By day I breathe deeply, while I learn to walk consciously through life. My body is becoming more flexible. My hikes are now far more enjoyable. My lungs breathe deeper, my legs feel strong, and my steps are lighter as I travel up and down mountain trails. I am becoming my new thoughts. My thoughts listen to a sacred call of the wild, my senses are renewed in nature. My thoughts are full of gratitude and honor the spirit of my ancestors. This natural way of living and eating becomes me, bringing calm to my body, clarity to my mind and peace to my soul. I’ll remember these sentences the next time a friend asks, “What’s the difference this time?” April 2020- I thank you, Eric Edmeades, for being the Knight that rescued me from the food dragon. I thank you for having the courage to push our heavily programmed world to a new paradigm where humans eat naturally. I am grateful for your love, your support and great energy. I have said good-bye to over 40 pounds, 24.5” and better yet a ton of thoughts and habits that no longer serve me. I am on a hero’s journey planning my next steps to release an additional 115 pounds. I am living consciously with plenty of “Wildfit Wisdom” for this adventure of transformation. Just one more thing. At thirteen my father took a close judgmental look at my five-foot ten frame. It was too large by his standards. Lovingly he said to me, “Someday you will be a long-stemmed American Beauty Rose.” Now as a late bloomer in life I close honoring my father’s words. I see this 70-year-old body blossoming into a “long-stemmed American Beauty Rose”. Deb Kelly Truckee, CA. Deb@lifeingredients.com
Over 60 years I battled emotional overeating and food disorders. (At least now I can identify my problems. In the early years I identified my problems by thinking I was fat, ugly and stupid, as there were no words to describe my food issues.) My days were filled with thoughts of food and failure. I was so lost I didn’t know who I was. I was always asking my friends, “Am I about that size?” Reality struck one day as I noticed the size of my shadow on the sidewalk. I mentally checked off the possibility of becoming the 49ers new right guard. Things got dark. There was no Knight in shining armor to shed a little light on my kingdom. I continued to eat my way through life. January 2020- My computer screen was filled with this charming guy recommending a program that redesigned his body and mind. I immediately thought, “Here we go again.” Another guy came on for the pitch talking about “Wild Things”. I signed up at… “It’s not your fault your fat”. February 2020- I was assigned a partner through our tribe’s Facebook group.
Erica from Canada has become my new best friend, as daily talks fortify our wild journey. Together we were introduced to the genius of the Wildfit program and the wisdom of its leader, Eric Edmeades. The first two weeks we joyfully ate a smorgasbord of anything we desired. “Without guilt I ate four donuts this morning,” I told Erica. Immediately I covered with, “I was supposed to, if I wanted them, Eric said so,” while feeling years of food guilt in my words. Erica reminded me, Eric also said, “Eat and drink green stuff daily.” I did that, too. Our friendly partnership was working and now cherished as we live “Wildfit”. I was introduced to my Angel and Devil voices, parts of me long forgotten. I journaled to reacquaint myself and the roles they played, even the ones beyond food. This work was profound for me and brought me to conscious eating, giving up years of eating in trance. Each week I consciously let go of one food and then another. These were trusted foods I had depended on for years to help me stuff emotions and feel better. Each week was an adjustment, marked with learning curves turning into wisdom. I was giving up food that was not natural to my body. Eric’s talk about the digestion system was like five-alarm sirens waking me up. He made it clear my digestive system has difficulty breaking down foods foreign to my body, such as the lifetime of processed foods I had been eating. This assimilation process is rigorous and draws energy away from other systems in my body. This stopped me in my tracks. I realized the years of exhaustion I had felt was caused by eating mountains of processed foods. Eating to feel better, I was actually draining my body of life energy. This knowledge changed my way of eating and my life forever. Noticing my face was thinner a friend asked, “What’s different this time?” “I no longer eat unconsciously, unless I do,” I said quickly to the set of deer in the head light eyes sitting across from me. March 2020- I was becoming aware that years of brainwashed thoughts wasn’t going to change overnight.
The most relevant information I discovered about myself was I had been an unconscious eater all my life. Now I am gentle with myself when I witness a “food faux pas” here and there. I know this behavior has been triggered by deep neuro grooves in my brain created by years of habitual patterns and programming. Now, I override these patterns by acknowledging them and replacing them with new thoughts, feelings and actions. Consciously I start deep breathing, or taking a walk, drinking water or just plain talking to myself telling my brain, “‘tis the season for change.” Change brings variety to my table from artichokes, kohlrabi, asparagus and greens too numerous to remember their names. As I dine on bits of wild venison, bison and salmon I sense a transgenerational change deep in my cells, the awakening of my hunter/gatherer lineage. Pulling “all-nighters” most of my life, making up for procrastination and self-doubt by day, I would use the mid-night oil to get a job done. Now, I lay me down to sleep when the stars peek out at twilight. I feel calm when I awake at 1 am, remembering this is quite a natural human response. Eric’s tales of the African Hadza tribe that awakes and gathers at the fire in the wee hours of the night reassured me of this natural instinct I hold. I light a candle and go about my night’s work with a sense of clarity. This clarity brings out my muse ready to author a new piece of work. In the past, her absence sent me on a night hunt among the refrigerator shelves. Another benefit of clarity, when hunger strikes, I rely on the juice of life, cool clear water. By day I breathe deeply, while I learn to walk consciously through life. My body is becoming more flexible. My hikes are now far more enjoyable. My lungs breathe deeper, my legs feel strong, and my steps are lighter as I travel up and down mountain trails. I am becoming my new thoughts. My thoughts listen to a sacred call of the wild, my senses are renewed in nature. My thoughts are full of gratitude and honor the spirit of my ancestors. This natural way of living and eating becomes me, bringing calm to my body, clarity to my mind and peace to my soul. I’ll remember these sentences the next time a friend asks, “What’s the difference this time?” April 2020- I thank you, Eric Edmeades, for being the Knight that rescued me from the food dragon. I thank you for having the courage to push our heavily programmed world to a new paradigm where humans eat naturally. I am grateful for your love, your support and great energy. I have said good-bye to over 40 pounds, 24.5” and better yet a ton of thoughts and habits that no longer serve me. I am on a hero’s journey planning my next steps to release an additional 115 pounds. I am living consciously with plenty of “Wildfit Wisdom” for this adventure of transformation. Just one more thing. At thirteen my father took a close judgmental look at my five-foot ten frame. It was too large by his standards. Lovingly he said to me, “Someday you will be a long-stemmed American Beauty Rose.” Now as a late bloomer in life I close honoring my father’s words. I see this 70-year-old body blossoming into a “long-stemmed American Beauty Rose”. Deb Kelly Truckee, CA. Deb@lifeingredients.com
