Here is the full on truth from my perspective.
In Feb 2018 I lost my 27 yo son.
In Feb 2021 I lost my husband of 44 yrs.
My life has blown up in my face and I no longer have the future I had dreamed of/worked towards for those 44 yrs. It was not a bad life, it could have been better, but, there is no way to go back and retrieve or re-assemble it.
Seven weeks ago, I wrote these words in my journal to describe how I was feeling: "I want to scream at the top of my lungs until I run out of lungs. I want to rip something big into little tiny shreads. I want to DESTROY something so that I can get rid of the pain. It feels like.... it feels like I just used my fist to punch through a plate glass window and shards of glass are raining down on me. They are slicing my arms open at the veins, they are gouging me in the shoulders. They are getting caught in my legs, the weight dragging them down my thighs and cutting into my knees, falling to cut off my toes. And bright red blood clouds my eyes and my judgement. I just want to take a shard of glass and hold it tightly in my hand as I cut out my heart to toss it away. Maybe without a heart, I won't feel this pain anymore." I wrote the words and then went to Facebook to mindlessly scroll through the pics of everyone else's happy lives and feel even worse. Actually, while scrolling, I was considering what form of suicide would be the least harmful for my daughter to have to deal with. I decided to live instead.
I ran across the Lifebook Online ad as I was skimming Mindvalley that day and signed up.
Six weeks later, I no longer have a blank slate, it is filled with the premise, vision, purpose and strategy for rebuilding my 12 life categories of life. It's a new day.
Thank you Jon and Missy Butcher for sharing your creation with us. I will be letting my friends know of Lifebook Online and the grounding it has given me to start my own creations.